PanAm

Don't you just love the new show PanAm? I like how effortless and beautiful the flight attendants make air travel seem.

I like to pretend I am a calm and wonderful traveler as well.

For instance...

This morning, my alarm went off at 4:45 am to get ready for my 7:45 flight to Louisville. Per my boss' recommendation I left my house at 5:30 to head to the airport.

As I pulled into my parking spot at the airport I cursed my boss for telling me to leave so early...15 more minutes of sleep would have been well worth it.

So I slowly get my things together and put my car keys in my purse. Oh, #>%}£ where is my purse??

(insert cold sweat here)

I look at the clock, it is 6:15am. If I leave right now I might be able to make it home and back.

Here is a run down of the next hour and a half:

a) lose parking ticket
b) find $1 in my car so I can get out of the tollbooth at the airport, most probably left by Carmen
c) take tollway north instead of south
d) get lost
e) get pulled over
f) realize state trooper stopped the guy behind me and start driving again
g) grab purse off kitchen counter
h) go back in house to look for cell phone
i) find cell phone in laptop bag-in car
j) call Kelling travel service: get gate and next flight info. next flight has me missing my meeting all together
k) back on interstate, curse low fuel light
l) back off interstate, fill gas
m) 10 miles to airport, call American Airlines- she sympathizes with my predicament but flight is still on time
n) park in the "who would ever pay $19 a day to park at the airport" lot
o) change from pumps to ballet flats and run to airport
p) check in counter says it's 7:33 your flight is at 7:45 you are too late
q) check in counter says wait, your flight is delayed
r) check in counter does not appreciate my gratitude
s) get pat down from TSA because I couldn't stand still in the vestibule
t) listen to TSA tell me I only had to stand still for seven seconds and I would have avoided pat down
u) arrive a gate, get funny looks, put various articles of clothing back on, board
v) look at everyone's big coats. realize my coat is in car.
w) flight attendant says "where's your coat girl?"
x) am reminded again that God answers prayers of all sizes
y) fasten seat belt
z) send in my application for PanAm, season II.

An unBEARable date?

Once upon a time in a land far far away there was a (grown) boy who liked bears. A lot.

Some of my friends (hey Kim!!!) told me this was a funny quirk but I wasn't sure.

And then

He took me on a date. To the zoo. To see the bears. In January.

My mother trained me well, it was cold outside so I had on long johns, snow boots, gloves, those hand heater things (in my boots AND gloves) and a coat. Even still, I was Freezing. And I had to stand outside in the cold watching those damn bears

He stood forever talking to the bears in baby talk voice (if you don't know how I feel about baby talk in general...) as I huddled against a wall that served as my wind block.

People came and went. and we stayed. Forever.

The bears weren't out and moving that night because, well it was below freezing. But we kept talking!!

Finally he heard my teeth chattering and I got to leave.

Dating lesson: boy who baby talks bears is crazy. (no need to mince words on this one)

A whole new sea of men (+ giveaway!)

I recently moved to the Big D for a new job. You better believe I'm excited about all the respectable, God-fearing, lovin their grannies young men I will meet.

In the meantime however, I am getting my new place set up.

But then...

woopsie!

Anywho, as my mother was helping me unpack a few kitchen boxes (pre-tornado zone) she told me several times I have way too much stuff.

Case in point, all the (Amazing!!) cocktail napkins I've acquired.



So, to please my mother, I am giving away my favorite napkins!

To enter leave a comment (anything, but it can't be political, Keith) below!

If you are lucky enough to win, I might even throw in the dryer cord packaging!

peace, love and unpacking, tb